1st ICN general Practice

Haiz…just came back from the 1st ICN general prac. The turnout on dance side was very good actually…Hmm I fink everyone came, need to check. But on wushu side, haiya…quite disappointing. Even though Jeremy did tell everyone to come. But then, even before we were estimating attendance to be abt 50%. We both agreed that it wld b a miracle if all 7o ppl turned up today. But still, we did manage to rehearse n do the transitions. I think I screamed quite a lot, so that everyone wld listen…I really apologize to those who I didn’t talk very nicely to. Haiz…funny how responsibility n stress can really change ppl sometimes. I hate it. I just hate it how this stupid ICN is making become. Oh well…I guess it’s not that super bad. The show I guess will be just OK. Though some parts still quite messy. N my happy dance also, we practice so much, but still messy I dunno y. Girls ok but guys cannot make it. I do wonder if its my choreo which is wrong. Maybe I messed up a bit there, so everyone is confused.
Sigh…I want our ICN perf to be so good…sacrifice so much…then if it turns out to b a disaster, I fink I really go n die. Yes, yes…perfectionist again I knw. But so what, last year during interview I told jcrc that I want to take DansDemonz to new heights…n so it shall b. At least I hope so. But damn it me n jer need the dancers n wushu ppl to support us. We cannot go n run the show by ourselves. How…
I knw during practices, general or others, surely many ppl very p…. erm very not happy with us, I mean me n Jeremy. Our style of leading n all. There always have to be unhappy ppl somewhere. But to those ppl, I want to tell them that I really try to make everyone happy. Cuz I knw in their place, I also surely wld b very put off…..like for ex. making me wait so long n all… But again, I dunno how else to do…Maybe ya, as Jer says, we’re not fit to be leaders…not yet maybe.

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